irresistable

2:50pm: ♥ spring fling concert<3

SOMEWHERE OUT THERE - from an american tale <3

somewhere out there, beneath the pale moonlight, someones thinking of me & loving me tonight. somewhere out there someones saying a prayer that we'll find oneanother in that big somewhere out there. & even though i know how very far apart we are, it helps to think we might be wishin' on that same bright star. & when the night wind starts to sing a lonesome lullaby, it help to think we're sleeping underneath the same big sky. somewhere out there, if love can see us through, then we'll be together, somewhere out there, out where dreams come true......

ME & NiCOLE!! *(hopefully do you believe in magic too!)*

i can't wait.

wish us luck.

8:31am: A night out
//edit;

in my field of paper flowers, & candy clouds of lullabys i'd lie inside myself for hours & watch my purple sky fly over me. don't say i'm out of touch with this rampant chaeos, your reality. i know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge. ( the nightmare i built my own world to escape... ) in my field of paper flowers, & candy clouds of lullabys i'd lie inside myself for hours & watch my purple sky fly over me.

\\endedit;

yesterday was so much fun. i woke up & mom was like "we're going to manhatten today, call brian." so i had to call brian & wake him up which was really cute. then we sat in the car for about an hour, driving up to NY with my 2cousins, mom, aunt&uncle, other uncle, & brian all in that one little car. [ lmao it was a TiGHT fit! ] once we found a parking garage, we walked to the empirestatebuilding. my uncle knew somebody who works there & he got us free admission tickets, that allowed us to cut infront of everyone waiting in line. it was hillarious 'cause it was supposed to be a 2hour wait, & we cut infront of everyone [ they were glaring at us... ] & went up to the 86floor & back down to ground level in 30mins. after that, we walked around for about an hour just 'people watching' as my mom says, & then we found this restaurant carmello's & waited for another hour, but had a great lunch. it was def. worth the wait. we ate for 2hours i'd say & we had so much food we all thought we were literally gonna explode. but it was good <3 then we walked back to the car & went home. me & brian chilled for a while, but then around 700 we went iceskating. it was fun. ohmygawd, dimi walked over around 930, & i swear to god he was either drunk or high or something but something was wack with him. it was weird... i didn't like it. but we had to leave anyway. [ thank god, he was weirding me out. ]

(  still not enough? :P  )

9:48am: To the City...

going to the city for the day<3 yea, i'm excited. brian's coming, & we're going to go walk around New York for the day until about 4 cause my cousin ethan is in daycare & we have to pick him up. plus at 430 my mom & i have facials & i have a manicure/pedicure so i'm xcited about that. today should be fun & i'll post about how it was after i get back. ( hopefully my mom will remember my babysitting money that she owes me from yesterday... ) so i can buy something cute. i need to go shopping badly. i need new clothes; i'm sick of what i have & i want new style <3 yay lmao.

time for me to peace ( for the moment atleast... ) much love*

dear, dear diary, i want to tell my secrets. 'cause you're the only one that i know who'll keep them. dear, dear diary, i want to tell my secrets. i know you'll keep them, & this is what i've done. i've been a bad, bad girl for so long. i don't know how to change what went wrong. daddy's little girl well, she went away. & what did it teach me? that love leaves... dear, dear diary, i want to tell my secrets. 'cause you're the only one that i know who'll keep them. dear, dear diary, i want to tell my secrets. i know you'll keep them, & this is what i've done. i've been down every road you could go. i made some bad choices as you know. seems i've got this whole world cradled in my hands but it's just like me not to understand. dear, dear diary, i want to tell my secrets. 'cause you're the only one that i know who'll keep them. dear, dear diary, i want to tell my secrets. i know you'll keep them, & this is what i've done. i learned my lessons. i turned myself around. i've got a guardian angel tattooed on my shoulder. she's been watching over me. dear, dear diary, i want to tell my secrets. 'cause you're the only one that i know who'll keep them. dear, dear diary, i want to tell my secrets. i know you'll keep them, & this is what i've done.dear, dear diary, i want to tell my secrets. 'cause you're the only one that i know who'll keep them. dear, dear diary, i want to tell my secrets. i know you'll keep them, & this is what i've done. i've been a bad, bad girl...

9:06pm: a look back on the day.

overview__today was.... interesting. it was definately a long day. i had to babysit my brother from like 700 to 1230. that got real annoying; he doesn't listen to shit that i say. i was on the phone with brian for a while & that was good, cause i love talking to my baby boy <3 so i went out to lunch with my uncle lenny, who's back in CT from california where he lives 'cause of my grandpawh's (his dad's) 70th bday. we went to Brock's restaurant & that was good. (nummy-nummsters food lol) then we picked up brian from his house before karate. me & brian chilled & "did-our-alone-time" for a couple of hours or so lmao, NO NOTHiNG LiKE THAT HAPPENED BUT i'M NOT GONNA SAY WHAT DiD 'CAUSE THAT'S MiNE & HiS BUiSiNESS! then we went to karate & chilled listening to songs on my iPod, & playing brick. (damn, i love that game!) then we actually had class, & my gawd, gary fucking killed me with the pushups. my arms are gonna be sore for a year, speshully considering i have a belt test saturday. (BLUE BELT DAMMiT!) anyway, after karate, brian went home with his dad & brother, & i went up to my aunts house for dinner. holy fucking shit, the roads were hell. it was soo hard getting home, i crossed my fingers & prayed to God that we would make it back in one peace. damn, my ass was scared.

head cold__uhg, i think i'm fucking getting sick. i have a stuffed up nose, my eyes hurt, & a cough like hell. where's the advil cold&sinus when you need it? i hate being sick. it sucks ass. not to mention that we're supposed to get a fucking blizzard on monday, & we're already getting up to 8inches of snow tonight. i hate the snow. i prefer sun, & summer showers much more thanks. anyway, i def. have to go buy something to take care of this.

poetic mind__i finally wrote! i'm so excited, because i haven't written in so long & it was really getting on my nerves that i'd had no inspiration for such a long time. it's called "a world in technicolor."

A bass line pounds in your ears. Sweaty bodies bounce up & down to the rhythmic club music. You stand there, on the outside, not caring to join in. An outsider, a loner, an addict, an alchoholic. Your black lip gloss smudges up your cheek as someone pushes past you, knocking you into a guy sitting at the bar. "You ok?" he asks sweetly. You nod, & try to escape. The least contact as possible, the better chance of making it out still breathing. "Where you off to?" he mutters under his breath. You shrug. He motions for you to sit down. "Let me buy you a drink." You nod, wondering if he's figured out you dont generally talk to people. He slips a few bills onto the counter, telling the bar tender to bring two more beers. You smile seductively as he hands you yours. He whispers in your ear "I can be everything you've ever wanted & more. Just give me a chance." Your eyes light up, but other than that, your facial expression doesn't change a bit. An hour later, you follow him out of the club, thankful for the slight chill in the air. You look up at the sky, which is not the usual blue-black color of the night, but a mixture of pinks & blues & greens & yellows you have never seen before. Everything seems brighter, happier. You see your world in technicolor. The next morning, you're in a bed, tangled in sheets, disoriented & confused. You don't know where you are & wonder how you got there. Scenes from the previous night flash through your head in chopped up segments, making it hard to distinguish which came first, & which came next. A tear rolls down your cheek. "Back to the beginning" you whisper to yourself. "Just another night on the town..."

hope you like!!!

time for me to peace. much love*

4:26pm: Do you believe in Magic?
that song makes me cry. end edit. (sorry that was so lame.

2:52pm: This is dedicated to Brian.
He says that he feels like I don't love him nomores, & that he's just a neusance to me. I just wanted him to know that he's so amazing & nothing could ever change that. I don't want to lose him & no matter how much he thinks about what happened over the summer '04, nothing like that will ever happen again & he keeps asking me "how am I supposed to believe you?" All I can say to that is that he just has to & that if he truely loves me he would be able to look past what happened then & move on to what's going on now. I love him so damn much, there's nothing that could ever change that. <3 When I was a little girl watching movies with my mom, I always wondered what it would feel like to be inlove, when I watched movies & saw actresses saying "when you're inlove, you'll know what it is. You'll know the true moment when you finally meet that somebody who sweeps you off your feet & is that perfect somebody who you're gonna spend the rest of your life with." I've always wondered what that felt like & now I can finally stop wondering, because I've found him & I know it sounds corny, but he truely did make me breathless when he first told me he loved me. <3 I love you Brian, for now & forever.

<3*

11:55am: Enigmatic-Star


EnigmaticStar. Cool site. Go add to your favorites & comment her. KTHNX<3

7:46am: Domain/ B2
//edit.

i think i'm getting sick, fucknugget. & i'm supposed to be going ice skating with brian tomorrow night. i just hope there's not too much snow for us to go... eurgh & i hope i get to see him today. that's all. comments please. \\endedit.

i'm not sure what's going on with my computer, but mamasgun.com & the registration of B2 on my computer aren't working like they're supposed to. *confusion* so now i guesse i just sit & wait & see what happens later today.

i have to babysit my brother nick today, so that should be interesting, to say the least. we may go up to my aunts house so i don't have to do much, but i do get paid today if i watch him. whatevs. hopefully it's worth my time & effort.

irita[«/-CLiCKABLE] from lovelovelove.us clothing, thanks so much for your offer of the custom t-shirt. i'll get back to you on that!
jessica[«/-CLiCKABLE] of mamasgun.com domain, thanks so much for hosting me & uploading b2 onto my site! i'm sure i'll figure it out =P

i'll edit later.

-|»Alyssa*

8:28pm: New Layout/ New Domain
i'm happy to announce that at mamasgun.com i'm officially being hosted! my site will be http://www.mamasgun.com/irresistable so i'm really excited about that. well wish me luck with my first domain<3! hopefully i wont fxck things up with this one... anyway, for my live journal, i know it's nothing special (seriously...) but i'm loving the plain&simplicity of the colors. hope you like.

-|»Alyssa*